Brother Game
by sierra.steinbrecher
Summary: It's the greatest challenge of the century. Millionaire duelist Seto Kaiba and ninja Sasuke Uchiha going up against prodigy state alchemist Edward Elric. The contest is a battle of...brotherly feelings? Don't own either anime.
1. The Kaibas

Me: Okay, I've seen a lot of anime by now, and keep coming across one thing: brothers. I mean, is there a single super popular boy's anime that doesn't have an older/younger brother pair (Yes, I count twins, and no, they don't have to necessarily be related by blood)? But not all these brotherly bonds are at the same level, so I decided to poke a little fun at some of the more ridiculous ones, using a pair that, in my humble opinion, blows every other away. Yes, even you Sasuke.

Sasuke: What?! There's no one better than me! I'm an Uchiha!

Me: Yeah, yeah. Go tell that to Rin and Luffy while you're at it.

Rin: Well, who's this amazing older brother? 'Cause no one's better than me.

Me: As a matter of fact, Rin, there is someone who beats you in the brotherly department and it's

Seto: Me, of course.

Me: (swats Seto in the back of the head.) Just for that, rich boy, you're up for critique first. Now please give up the disclosure, boys.

Alphonse: Sierra owns none of the anime she uses in this story, and there are actually quite a few. (looks at a chapter in the far off distance) Is that Ouran Host Club?

Me: Yes. I did say I counted twins after all. But more on those two later. And, after that enormous and hopefully not sleep worthy author's note, let's get down to business. Take it away, boys!

**Chapter One**

Seto flipped through his emails, most either junk, advertisements, work-related business that someone got the wrong address for, or some money grubber wanting a piece of his company. He clicked on the one for Mokuba's school and saw a flyer for the festival. He deleted it quickly. There was no way he'd show up to such an event. Mixing with dweebs just wasn't his style.

"And you call yourself a big brother."

Seto spun around. "Who said that?"

"You could have at least asked Mokuba if he wanted you to go." The voice was male, but not one of his business colleagues or anyone from that annoying dweeb fest.

"Show yourself!" He yelled into the shadows. Who was stalking him, and what did they want? Someone stepped out of the corner of his office and glared with golden eyes at him. Seto leveled his own glare. "Who are you and what do you want?"

"I'm just a real older brother," continued the blond boy, "and I want you to ask your brother if he wants you to come to the festival. If he says yes, you go."

"And why would I do that? Why should I waste my time fooling around with cheap carnival games when I have a company to run?" Kaiba smirked at the boy. He could level accusations all he wanted, but there was still no way the boy would convince him to waste his time like that.

The intruder smirked. "Let's play a game. If I win, you do what I want."

"And if I win," asked the other boy with an air of confidence bordering on arrogance. He never lost a game.

"I'll admit that you're a better brother to Mokuba than I thought. And I'll make you one thing of your choosing." He clapped his hands together and pressed them to the book shelf next to him. A small crater appeared in the wooden surface as a wooden blade appeared in the stranger's hand.

Kaiba hid his surprise behind a scowl. The dweeb squad always preached about magic, but this, this was real. "What's the game?"

"Simple. We see who's the better brother."

Icy blue eyes rolled. "Please. How would you judge such a competition?"

"By these standards." The boy pulled a sheet of paper out of his pocket and put it on Kaiba's desk. It read

1. Time spent with him

2. Efforts to protect each other

3. Sacrifices made for each other

4. How well you work together

5. His own opinion

Seto laughed at the list. "This will be short then." He motioned to the chair in front of the desk and the blond youth took the seat.

"Alright, first point, and it's pretty appropriate since you claim you don't have time for him."

Seto scoffed. "Well it's not like I'm always the one who decides how to spend my time. I do have to run this company, and he has school. You and your brother probably don't have those kinds of responsibilities."

"Actually," and the boy had the nerve to put his feet up on Kaiba's desk, "I do have a job. I'm a researcher and agent for the military, and that takes more time than even a full time job like yours. Although my brother doesn't have to go to school, being a genius, so I suppose you have a point."

Kaiba closed his eyes and let his smirk widen . "Then how much time can you really afford to spend with your brother?" He'd won this already.

"Every waking moment." Kaiba's eyes snapped open and were filled by the cheeky grin of the boy in front of him. "On to the next point."

"Wait!" Kaiba halted the kid. "How is that possible, you said you worked!"

"Yeah," the kid put his hands behind his head and relaxed, "But Al comes with me on all my trips and helps me research too. Oh wait, that was for a later point." He leaned forward again and put his elbows on the table. "How much time do you spend with your little brother?"

"Let's just move on," growled out Kaiba. This was not what he'd been expecting.

"Fine with me. So what have you had to do to protect your little brother?"

Kaiba regained some of his swagger. "I built this whole company to protect him. And I go after him and save him when he gets kidnapped by our competitors, like that lousy Pegasus."

"yeah, yeah," moaned the kid, "but what did you actually have to do to get him back all those times?"

"I fought in high stakes duel, put my life on the line for him." That made the kid sit straight.

But the drawl was still evident in his voice. "Oh yeah? Give me an example. Talk about that Pegasus guy you mentioned earlier."

So this kid thought he knew everything, did he? Well he wouldn't be smiling much longer. Kaiba launched into a very in depth telling of all the events at Duelist kingdom, even including the parts he didn't necessarily believe. Anything to get this kid off his high horse.

"So let me get this straight," asked the kid as he leaned forward. "One lost duel put you in an emotionless state so deep that you didn't notice youre own little brother getting kidnapped? I'll admit what you did to get him back was impressive, even though I don't believe half of it, but the fact that you let him be taken in the first place?" A blond eyebrow arced. "Kinda negates all the trouble you went through, and you didn't even succeed."

Kaiba's eyes narrowed. "Well how have you protected your little brother?"

"Well, he's pretty tough, so his body doesn't need to be protected." A smile graced his features. "Actually, he's stronger than me in a lot of ways. I guess I don't really protect him at all." He turned that smile on Kaiba. "You win this one, I guess."

"Of course." The millionaire smirked.

"Man, why does everyone smirk at me? He's almost worse than Mustang," Ed muttered under his breath before returning to a normal tone. "Okay, what sacrifices have you made for your brother? Not that you actually did, probably."

"I gave up most of my childhood to take care of him! Our stepfather drove me to my limits, and threatened to throw me and Mokuba out if I didn't measure up!"

"Lucky," Ed replied to the yelling teen. "I didn't really get a childhood at all. Still," he looked back at the other teen leaning over the desk so their faces were about a foot apart, "that's more than I expected."

"What gives you the right to judge me?" the blue-eyed youth spat out.

"Well…" The other teen reached up to his neck and undid the clasp on his black jacket under the red coat. He pulled the right sleeve on both down and exposed his right shoulder. His metal right shoulder. "I think the fact that I gave my right arm and became a military dog at the age of twelve for my brother gives me some say."

Kaiba stood straight again and sat back down in his chair. He had not been expecting that.

Edward pulled the fabric back over his shoulder and fastened the clasp. "Let's move on." He glanced at the sheet of paper and asked, "How well do you two work together?"

The question woke up Kaiba's arrogance. "Oh please. I don't need Mokuba's help."

"So you don't work together," interpreted the annoying blond. "Or rather, you wouldn't admit you needed his help even if you did."

"What about you," retorted Seto. "Does your little brother always have to bail you out?"

"Sometimes," admitted the other boy, "But more likely we're in the situation together, since that's how we do everything. Except those times when he got kidnapped by Greed and Pride." He scratched at his chin. "I guess I did have to bail him out of those, kind of. But that's beside the point. Fact is that Al and I are on equal footing with each other. We couldn't do anything without the other, in fact, we wouldn't want to." Then he pulled a Mustang, that is to say, he smirked. "Guess I win this round too." Then he pulled a radio transmitter out of his coat pocket. "Now let's see what our little brothers think."

But Seto knocked it out of his hands. "Forget it. You've already won this."

Ed shrugged. "Fine, but I wouldn't pass up the chance to hear what your brother really thinks of you." He grabbed the paper off the desk, picked up the small transmitter and headed for the door. "Just be sure to ask Mokuba about that festival."

Kaiba just sat at his desk for a few moments after the strange boy left his office. Then he checked the time. 4:30. Mokuba would be out of school by now. He picked up the phone and speed dialed his brother's number.

**If you liked it, I'll do another brother pair. Please review and tell me what you thought.**


	2. The Uchihas

Ed: Hey, it wasn't that bad. (punches Seto in the arm.) You did win a few categories, at least.

Seto continues to stare off into the distance, shell shocked.

Me: Ed, you beat him. We all know this is what Seto does when he gets beat. Either that or lash out at Joey. Now, if you would.

Ed: Right. Sierra owns neither FMA nor Naruto, which is where my next victim comes from.

Me: Actually, I'm letting Al do this one.

Ed: What?!

Sasuke didn't know why this iron monolith was running his psyche evaluation for possible disorders or problems that could cause problems on missions, but he wanted to get stronger to kill his brother, and the only way to do that was to become a shinobi. Therefore, he had to pass this test.

The suit of armor clanked slightly as he leaned forward. "Let's get started. Please tell me about your relationship with your elder brother, Itachi Uchiha." _Brother, you owe me for this. _But the Kaiba brothers had worked out well enough, so who was he to complain? He hated seeing any sort of family at odds like this.

Al picked up the single sheet of paper and handed it to the bored teen. "These are the qualities I will be asking about." Sasuke eyed the list and almost laughed. Well, this would be an easy conversation.

1. Time spent with him

2. Efforts to protect each other

3. Sacrifices made for each other

4. How well you work together

5. His own opinion

"What standard will I be judged against?" he asked his interrogator.

"You will be judged against a different, more stable relationship. Should you fail the test, you will be subjected to a week spent improving your relationship with your brother before being released for active duty. Now please answer the first question."

Sasuke smirked. "You can't administer that punishment. He fled."

"Yes, but my partner has retrieved him." Fancy eyes or not, his brother was the Fullmetal Alchemist. Itachi hadn't been all that hard to get.

Sasuke leapt into action. "Where is he? You had better have left him alive. I still have to get my revenge."

_Oh boy, _groaned the armored teen inwardly. _Maybe I should have let Edward handle this after all. _He didn't need to be screamed at, so Alphonse diverted attention back to the matter at hand. "You will see him, without weapons and with a non-aggression order, should you fail this test. Now, how much time have you spent with him recently?"

"He's a traitor of the village, living on the run! How much time do you think I spent with him?" The teen roared. "And even before that, he never had time for me," mumbled to boy under his breath.

"That's a negative point." Alphonse placed a check mark next to the question. "Have you ever had to protect your brother, or tried to do so?" A glare was his only answer. He placed a check mark beside that question too. "Have you ever made sacrifices for your brother?"

"Yes." Al perked up at the positive answer. "I've dedicated my whole existence to growing stronger, strong enough to kill him." The boy deflated. That had not been the kind of sacrifice he'd been thinking of, although it was a valid point. It just needed to be explored more. Who knows, there might be real love buried under there.

"Why do you want to kill him so much?" _Please, say something positive._

"He killed our whole clan in front of me, and then taunted me, saying I wasn't strong enough to defeat him. Well I will be someday, even if it means I can't have friends or comrades."

Al reeled back. This was far worse than the Kaiba situation! "Why would he do that?"

"To get stronger. Why else?"

Al narrowed his eyes at that. That sounded like the sort of answer Ed might give him if he didn't want Alphonse to know the truth. "Did he tell you that?"

"Yes."

"And you never questioned it?" The other boy's head snapped up and he scrutinized Alphonse. The armored teen plowed ahead. "Wasn't your brother already strong by that time? Why did he have to get stronger? Even you have a reason." The other teen fell silent at that. What reason could Itachi have, unless he just wanted to be strong for the sake of being strong? But that didn't make sense, not with the kind face and gestures he remembered from before the massacre. Could there be more to it?

Alphonse let the boy stew for a few moments before moving onto the next question. "Did you guys ever work together on something?" The boy shook his head.

Al turned away from the boy and held up the small radio. He pressed the transmission button and said "Ed, you there? Copy," into the small microphone.

Ed's voice replied through the static. "I'm here. Is it time for the last question already?"

"Yeah," Alphonse replied. "Is Itachi there?"

"Yep. He's tried to escape at least fifteen times, though. Should I put him on?"

"Not yet," he answered. "Let me tell Sasuke."

"Okay, but hurry up. I don't know how many more attempts I can take before I just knock the guy out."

Alphonse chuckled at his older brother's temper and turned back to the boy across the table. "The last part is different." The teen brought his head up and made eye contact again. Al held up the small radio. "My partner asks your brother what he thinks of you and we both listen. Are you ready?" Sasuke wanted to run. Itachi was going to tell him that he was horrible, weak, a disgrace to their name. He shut his eyes tight and looked away. Screw the Uchiha name, he was not going to just sit there and listen to this!

The radio crackled to life as Ed's voice asked someone else, "What do you think of your little brother, Sasuke?"

"He needs to get stronger," answered Itachi's disembodied voice and Sasuke flinched away from the sound. "so he can come kill me. I need him to wipe away the stain of our family and complete what I started."

"Do you think he loves you, at all?" Edward had clearly been thrown for a loop as much as Al had today. How could two brothers feel this way about each other?

"I hope he doesn't. That will make his task easier. I have done my best to ensure that, when we meet, he can kill me without a shred of remorse. That is not something I wish for him to endure." Numbly, Al put another check point on the paper and went to tell the instructor the results. Those two needed some serious quality time.

With supervision.

Armed supervision.

**Man, this was supposed to be funny and ended up serious instead. I'm lousy at this sort of thing. Please Review, and let me know if any of this was decent.**


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